Ayson, the little blond one was up early, as usual, and out managing our public relations department with most of our retired neighbors. I found him across the street watching our friend wash his truck. A half hour or so later as I sipped my coffee on the patio he asked if he could wash my Jeep. "No", I said with my next sip and more fully concentrating on the latest Facebook drivel as my finger flicked the page up on my tablet with a mind of it's own. "Oh, why not?", he asked. My default setting and the law of physics for an object at rest immediately began the pursuit of reason. "Ah, you'll get all wet and we don't need to wash the Jeep and..." I think I sort of just drifted off there at the end, inaudible I'm sure. Ace, of course, pressed me on the matter and then it hit me - why not?
How often do we default to "no" when "yes" isn't really a big deal? It's Saturday, Independence Day! That's actually a big part of this. Ayson likes water and Jeeps and acts of service and he also, as all kids do, wants to expand his independence. This is one of those moments for him to do a grown-up thing. He just saw one of his grown-up friends doing the same thing and now he's out there with his brother getting to do it too.
In the end it wasn't a big deal for me (actually a good thing) to put down the tablet and tune out of Facebook and instruct my boys on the lost art of washing a car by hand. That's something they have rarely, if ever seen me do. As a teenager I used to live for Saturday morning detail sessions with my most prized four-wheeled possession, but now it's much easier to get magically transported through a soapy tunnel for $10 and keep the A/C running.
So before you throw out that "no" next time stop and think about the possibilities of "yes". Unless they're asking for more screen time, but that's a topic for another day.
Happy Independence Day!
A.J.
Good choice and great advice!
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